I have been thinking a lot about what i want to when I come home even though I have no idea how long it may be before i do such a thing. I'm not too sure its a good idea to be thinking that way. I am afraid it'll be hard to keep focused on what I am doing here.I don't feel like I am supposed to stay here for ever. Which is a really difficult concept. I am really searching my heart and trying that thought from every angle I can find. I would feel so guilty leaving for good. On the other hand, there is a LOT of stuff that can be done to help on the state side. Still, I don't want logical thoughts, I want God thoughts. Especially if they are thoughts like that one that can affect decisions and lead to errant patterns of thinking. I have got to get new shoes, especially now that its acting like the rainy season because these shoes leak really badly. Somehow my socks get wet if there is even a sixteenth of an inch of water on the ground. I am here to learn, grow, get some good habits set, and get some Godly thought patterns established. One of my most common prayers lately has been "Father set this in stone in my heart and mind, engrave it on my very soul." I have been seeing myself forgetting very important lessons. I also have been remembering lessons I learned a long time ago that I had forgotten. I have been too lazy about transfering lessons learned into everyday behavior.